I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
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