Dude, you just left me a 3 minute voicemail of pop rocks in your mouth. Im sitting right next you
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
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