Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
Randomize
