fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
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