so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
Disregard any previous text from the past 12 hours. Except for the one about scoring a strike while drunk bowling. Remember that one.
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
Ugh I need to clean my floors/walls/ I actually don't understand why boys get drunk and pee on things
Next time one of us has a party everybody has to wear a diaper. But actually you just need a shit ton of disinfectant wipes and maybe a hazmat suit.
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
Randomize
