respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
Randomize
