I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
Randomize