Soap is not a condiment
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
Randomize
