i barfeds in our rink
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
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Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
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