In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
The barista asked if I wanted my drink wet or dry, but all that came to mind was farts. You have ruined me.
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
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