In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
Randomize
