Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
Randomize
