HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
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