He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
Randomize
