Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
I just wanted to check in on you and you replied with a selfie with your Coney Island waiter and the caption "after his shift we're dropping acid together"
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
Fuck me I smell like cheese
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
Randomize
