Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Randomize
