Writing a book: The Evolution of the Douche Bag: From Popped Collars to Ed Hardy Shirts. Doing research now.
Make sure you include chapters on white sunglasses, spray tans, and toxic amounts of hair gel.
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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