You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
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