Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
Randomize
