I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
Randomize
