Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
