He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
Randomize
