I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
Randomize
