im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
Randomize
