have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
I'm drunk from drinking bourbon out of a "cupcake sippy cup" at the Denny's bar. What the fuck happened to the goals I had?
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
Randomize
