At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
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