I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
gave myself the "you're a really good girlfriend" talk on the way to where i intentionally cheated on him. i am my own drunken therapist.
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
Randomize
