This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
God doesn't care if you're a paramedic, you can't do that to someones cat and still get into heaven
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
