he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
