I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
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