please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
I just woke up on an unfamiliar floor, my shoes are gone, my suits covered in red lipstick and chocolate, and Im wearing sunglasses that say "Maid of Honor".God damnit I love this country.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
Randomize
