Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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