Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
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