Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
He was all like, "I think ur the one that got away and I miss you." I replied, "I gave u a hand job once in your hot tub. No need to wax nostalgic about it."
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
Randomize
