I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
Randomize
