Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
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