I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
I've been eating like all day, let me suffer my one 'Dear lord, I'm the size of a small whale. One that doesn't even need to find being killed by illegal whaling because I'm not even big enough to provide an decent blubber, but still big enough to be considered for a brief moment.' moment in peace.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Randomize
