He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
My vagina just clenched in fear
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
Randomize
