just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
