I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
dude, i look like john mccains neck right now
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
So vagazzling was a success
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
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