It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
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