She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
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