ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
See, the Lortab wasn't working enough, so I thought "hey, vodka can speed that up! That's how science works!" Which probably should've been my indication that the Lortab was in fact working
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
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