That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
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