I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
I want her autograph on my taint
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
Our Uber driver pulled over to show us Tinder some dick pics. Top that.
Randomize
