So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
Guess who got arrested for public drunkiness, and called jimmy johns for the entire station last night instead of someone to bail me out? The cop that arrested me drove me home. Win.
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
Randomize
