Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
Randomize
