We should be called the Road Head Warriors
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
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