Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
Randomize
