I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
Randomize
